I think that I'm falling out of like or lust or love I'm not sure what it is but I'm fall out of it I feel bad I feel like I'm some how betraying him I am a fickle person fickle horrid person

I'm going to kill him he is such an ass I don't get what the hell his problem is why doesn't he just get off my ass fuck! I'm always this big bad person and he is the little kid I'm hurting or something. Why does he like to play the victim so much . GOD 
 

Stones taught me to fly
I'm so sick of this I'm so sleepy I'm so hungry I'm so everything I just want to graduate and get eveything dumb over with I want to be 25 married and have a baby on the way!!

How stupid could I be! I know he's no good for me. I'm so dry it's like I am on empty I have very little emotion left. I'm crying right now for no good reason aside from just being lonely I'm so hollow . I think if some one should tap on me I would echo damein rice is good heart breaking music and I am heart broken and bitter I'm sick of that kinda I need to stop letting my self get this way it's not a good thing and takes up alot of energy that I need to put in other relationships and to meake them healthy.

Zeb........ I'm so not over the intense damage he has done to my soul. I have a hole it is wide open gaping oozing out of my side. It has an infection fear.
I am so scared to love someone and have them hurt me like he did.
I got sick when he took his love back. I threw up over him I cried I mourned like someone had died and someone had, I had died I was no longer whole I was missing huge pieces like whole body parts my whole insides felt as if they had swelled and were going to explode or something no they felt like I was bruised from the inside like I had the worst flu ever and was going be paralyzed I wanted to die I didn't know what to do I don't see why people throw them selves in to there work it doesn't help you forget for a short time then when you are still and quiet long enough it all comes back and you are knocked over by it again shot down paralyzed trying to grasp a string of hope so that you can live on I hate him. I hate what I have let him do to me I hate my fear I hate my silent sorrow that I have had for so long that I think I should miss it if I were to feel better I hate that when I get better I will miss the pain.
LOVE is a disease for which there is no cure it worms it's way in to everything and everyone and destroys all in it's path.

How exciting I have a blogger!!! I'm very happy about this new thing I hope I remember to use it